June 25, 2012

Make A Wish

Today is a day of wishing,
Longing, 
Dreaming,
Hoping, 
Yearning.
A day of things that aren't, 
Things that might,
And things that cannot.
I wish I were in Seattle.
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{Taken by Brianne, edited by me}
I know: this is a very random thought.
But it's true.
I wish I were in Seattle.
I wish I were in Seattle, at a small coffee shop, writing meaningless poetry and watching the rain fall.
Or perhaps wandering Pike's Place market, buying some fish for dinner.
I always feel this way when I listen to this song.
I think it has to do with the fact that it was my favourite tune last time I visited: I swear, I listened to it a hundred times a day, and it was never more fitting than when we were gliding on a massive ferry across the waters of  Elliot Bay to reach the heart of the city.
And right now, hot and dry outside, I wish I were in the cold, wet, familiarity of an northern ocean town. 
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I wish I could take a giant hook, cast it into the sea, and tie the other end around my waist.
That way, no matter where I went, I could drag a portion of the ocean behind me wherever I go. 
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I wish life had a undo/redo button, a giant eraser, and a copy and paste.
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I wish my wanderlust affected only my physical, temporal being. 
Instead, it seeps through the cracks and affects the way I walk with Christ. 
Instead of constantly clinging to Him, I often look up to find that I've instead moved so far away. 
I wish that I trusted Him as implicitly as I should, as I even desire to.
This is one of those wishes that can be a reality.
It's one of those things that requires action, although not entirely of myself.
Two weeks ago during a sermon, our pastor said something that I know to be true, and is something I should like to never forget. He was speaking on our need for Christ, and how little we can do without him. 
"We will never reach a point at which we can be independent of God: we are in a state of constant desperation, and only God can fulfill and bring peace."
I might feel I'm doing well, but it's never long before Christ lovingly opens my eyes to the fact that I'm becoming more "self-reliant," and it's usually about the time that I begin to struggle more with the eating disorder, stress, and people.
It's His way of showing me that I need to run back to Him to bear the load, because it's a load that I can't even begin to carry.
(Whew! End of passionate speech.)
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I wish we could travel from place to place with just the snap of our fingers.
Can you imagine baking a pie for someone across the country, snapping your finger, and being able to knock on their door and share it with them still warm?
Or perhaps you're missing your grandmother in California, or should like to make it to a showing of Mary Poppins on Broadway. 
No problem! 
Just *snap* and you're there
(well dressed, of course)!
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I wish it were December.
This is really sad, I know, but I have my reasons.
Reason number one.
Brianne and Ryan's wedding.
This is awesomeness, and makes December entirely worth being excited for in and of itself.
But is that all?
No!
Les Miserables 
(The musical turned film!!)
Will be out that month!!
*Commence running around and shrieking in excitement*
If you haven't seen the trailer, you really are in desperate need of it.
And if you have, well, you obviously aren't excited enough about it, so let's geek out some more together.
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Gaaaah!
Every time I watch that trailer I have a heart attack and want to cry tears of excited, frustrated joy!
I may not last until Christmas.
Heavens only knows what they mean by "Christmas".
It could be Christmas Day, it could that week, it could just be during the Christmas season...
Either way, I'm very excited.
I'm going to take my little old self on a date that night
(Because I don't know of anyone as musically obsessed as I who would go see it with me)
And I'm going to sing raucously along with every word.
And because it will probably be the midnight premier, everyone else in the crowd will probably be musical nerds too, and will probably be singing along as well. 
People,
I haven't been this excited about something since the last season of Dr. Who.
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I wish I were eating blueberry scones and drinking tea.
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Psh.
I think I'm going to defer my wishes for now and go and bake some!
Cheerio!

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