I'm on a very important mission.
The great college search.
Yes, I did this last year, and still didn't end up doing anything,
But this year is, and shall be, different.
This time, I'm,
Wait for it...
Of course, it might help if I actually knew what the heck I'm supposed to and/or want to do with myself.
Anyone who's been a reader here long enough knows my penchant for...unsurity.
I totally just invented a new word.
All of these labels are floating around in my head in a great, big, heaping mess, amid college names, financial information, and fragments of The Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll.
I'm a very confused, very overwhelmed individual at the moment.
A year ago, I was thinking more along the lines of this.
Today (and the past month or so), however, I've been feeling a little more like this.
I love history.
...Colonial American history with a fondness for...
...The Revolutionary War.
The practical person in me leans much more heavily towards the topic of History, the prospect of being a historian, museum curator, historical librarian (Hello, Library of Congress!), and the like. The non-practical side of me likes the idea enough to heavily over-romanticize it. It has me picturing myself as a protector and guardian of the past, every once in a while jaunting off on an adventure that one might see in a National Treasure film. In reality, it's just a lot of dusty books, long hours spent sitting still, and a great deal of classification.
The practical me immediately starts to search for what one with a History degree could do.
Things like becoming an archivist.
(Yes, that is very much a picture of the Jedi Archives as seen in Star Wars. Yes, I'm a bit of a nerd. Don't be a hater.)
Other options include Art history, historical art and/or document conservationist, and a list of other things that probably don't sound as interesting to you as it does to me.
And all the while, in the back of mind, I still have that bit of me that says "What about music?" and "What about drama? What about this?"
Which is immediately replaced by the recollection that I don't want to be placed in an arena that emphasizes so strongly the human body, and pushes for perfection in physical appearance. To a girl trying to recover from an eating disorder, that feels like walking straight into a trap.
Anyway, the point is I feel like I'm surrounded by options that all sound nice, but I have no idea if they are what I want to do or should be doing.
I keep praying about it, and I still feel answer-less, although that could be the impractical, over-romanticizing part of me again, expecting it to be written on the wall or revealed to me through a bolt of lightening in the head.
The only thing that I think could be an indicator so far is how I keep ending up back at the University of Maryland's website as I investigate History majors, and heaven knows I'm probably doing that on purpose.
I really am a gypsy.
Who else out there is wandering through vocations like me?
Anyone doing any college searching?
I hope everyone's New Year was-and still is- fantastic.
I was lucky enough to be able to dance the night away at a friend's party (held in a barn, complete with an entire professional sound-system and lights. Awesome!), and play hide-and-seek in the local Wal-Mart.
This is Idaho, y'all!
Do any of you have any resolutions?
If I come up with any, I'll be sure to let you know.